Just realized the last post I had posted when I was taking my 2 hour glucose test. Well, I failed that miserably and after about a week of wallowing In myself and mourning my health, I found purpose in walking through it in Jesus. In my pregnancy with Sophia, it was a type of blind faith in walking through. I didn't know if she would be whole when she was born or what her health was. I had to trust in Him that He knew and would take care of her. Well, this pregnancy was different, it was my body not the baby that I had to trust in Him in. With gestational diabetes, a bout of kidney stones and a struggle to regulate my thyroid hormone, I was put at my weakest physically. Isn't it like Him to make us weak so we can be reminded of how strong He is. I think it was in that season that I learned to thank Him for showing us how much we truly need Him. For making us to need Him.
I surely and truly need Him. I can't handle my own crazy on my own let alone anything this world has to offer.
Well, Joseph is here and we are all healthy and doing well. So far 5 has been an easier transition than 4 was. 4 was a struggle and game changer for me, with 5 I feel like I'm playing the same game just at a new level. It's not overwhelming as much as it is just busier. It's like trying to keep serenity while giving a bunch of cats a bath or herding circus monkeys around. Haha. No, it's really no different than having a couple, just like I said a little busier. I just count heads all day:)
I find that once you submit to something, it becomes easier. Like a clear word from the lord, you submit and it's not as much a struggle because there is no other option. 5 kids is my blessed word from the Lord this season, homeschooling is my word from the Lord, living in Kansas is my word from the Lord and so much more. It's a simple as saying Yes to Jesus and letting him guide you(sometimes carry) and bless you through. Don't get me wrong, sometimes it sucks, sometimes it's a breaking and sometimes I want to give back some of the blessings(not the kids... well, most of the time;) but it's in those moments that I find shine the most in knowing that He is enough and He is worth it. Here is a little breaking point I had one day after Joey was up all night....
"One of those days where I could easily slip into that place of whining and focusing on the hard things of living away from my family....was sitting here having one of those moments when I hear the lord whisper to me, "Am I worth it?". Immediately I know the answer- Yes, Lord, you are worth it. You are worth every hard day and worth every good day. You are worth every mile apart and every sacrifice, You are worth weeks between hugs from Mimi and papa and aunts and uncles and sleepless nights turned to busy days. HE IS WORTH IT. My hormones will mellow and my sleep will get better and my God will be just as faithfully worth it when it's easy as He was when it was hard. Thankful that we serve a God who is worth it. Xoxo. He has shifted my heart from weary and worry to peace and praise. Amen"
I started this blog while sitting in the optometrist office getting my 'bigs' eyes checked for school. We've managed to try to jump back into life again. We've accomplished doctors, dentist, eye exams, Walmart and field trips on our own. I haven't even lost anyone yet. The bigs are great helps. So thankful for my big girls. The lord knew what He was doing when He gave me them first. Anyway we are starting school this week. So excited about it, the Lord has changed my perspective and giving me a new vision and word and I can't wait to walk it out. It's good to be in the will of the Lord, folks. Read this quote the other day and it truly inspired me.
"Every choice you make in life(including homeschool-related decisions) is motivated either by faith or by fear. Fear-riven choices always bear bitter fruit. Don't homeschool or choose a curriculum because of fear! Make every choice based on faith- and thenTRUST the God who has called you to homeschooling. He is MORE than sufficient to make you successful!!"
-Steve and Jane Lambert
Here is a message I sent to a sister that depicts our first day today:
"We started school today. Morning time is our heart of school(+with fiar{five in a row}) later with abeka as our nuts and bolts. Been listening to podcast from the link you sent, feeling inspired. 😀 woke up with a migraine trying set in, Ryan's truck broke down so have had to load up kids twice and go help him, Sophia and Joseph are both wanting to be held. 😂😂😂 We did it tho, even if a box of cheeseits are poured out on the floor in the den and my house has been taken over by tiny Lego pieces that will most likely get lost until found by a bare foot. 😁😆 It'll get better and flow more smoothly but ain't nothing gonna keep us down today:)"
She told me I should blog about it- so this me being obedient. The thing is that if I woke up this morning without a vision, without faith for walking out homeschooling a k4, 1st and 2nd grader(with a 1 year old and infant) I would have given up, had a panic attack, cried and probably ate a lot of chocolate. Ok, I still may have eaten a lot of chocolate either way, but because I felt the prompting and the stirring of the Lord Jesus inside me to do this I could take it all in with a peace and faith that every little thing was gonna be alright. And you know what?! It was, It is and It will be because He said so. It might not be easy or pretty and might hurt like heck(like stepping on a tiny Lego barefoot) but in Faith all things are possible. I'm so thankful for faith to walk when I just can not see it, hear, feel, taste or smell it on my own.
I hope if you are feeling weak, worn and in fear or doubt that you'll hear from heaven a fresh vision to be on mission for Jesus. No matter what it is, he can turn the fear into faith. It's as simple as saying yes, folks. It really is.
Hugs and kisses from the Vandenberg 7
yeah I said 7, guys
Phew... We are truly blessed.
Here are a few school pictures. Oh my heart, they grow too fast.
The youngest two scholars don't really do much but make messes but they are pretty cute=)
Sent from my iPhone